I had mixed emotions when someone I casually knew, died in a nursing home, after at least a seven year struggle. I suppose the main emotion was an angered relief.
Relief at the fact that he is no longer suffering like a dog and anger at the fact that if he were lucky enough to be a dog, would unlikely have been allowed to get to such a wrecked physical state.
I am also annoyed that many people have to almost bankrupt themselves, to pay for an ending like this.
Towards the end, he was dealing with one degrading infection after another, with some teeth and part of his tongue missing, as a result of vicious facial spasms
I went to see him once. He was in a bland little room, which coldly met his need for round the clock care. Multiple sclerosis had decimated his life. He was still only 48.
The smell of disinfectant, which tries fruitlessly to disguise the smell of soiled people or objects, is often the first assault when you enter a place like that.
You can forget a good night’ sleep in those twilight worlds, where screams and moans can never be silenced. I couldn’t get out of there fast enough.
A horrible future with my name on it, which I am tasting bitterly now, was calling!
I continue to try and dodge that bullet, as best I can, for as long as I can.
Surely as a society, we can do so much better. Basically as the law stands now, it promotes the various cult beliefs, that it is somehow justifiable to live like a complete dog, to have your body turned into a painful prison.
All of this is allowed in a mistaken belief, that you will receive a much better after life.
RIP VM. Hopefully yours and others situation, will soon become a horrible memory, of what we as humans used to do, in our dark and primitive days.
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